“From the rational point of view, what new factor has H.’s death introduced into the problem of the universe? What grounds has it given me for doubting all that I believe? I knew already that these things, and worse, happened daily… We were even promised sufferings. They were part of the programme. We were even told, ‘Blessed are they that mourn,’ and I accepted it. I’ve got nothing that I hadn’t bargained for. Of course it is different when the thing happens to oneself, not to others, and in reality, not in imagination.”
“But of course one must take ’sent to try us’ the right way. God has not been trying an experiment on my faith or love in order to find out their quality. He knew it already. It was I who didn’t… He always knew that my temple was a house of cards. His only way of making me realize the fact was to knock it down.”
- C.S Lewis, “A Grief Observed”
The above are two excerpts from an amazing, compact novella by C.S. Lewis entitled A Grief Observed. In reading it I can honestly say that I felt both the pain that Lewis went through when his wife passed away, as well as the fear that I have inside myself about facing true sufferings.
As well, I believe that the observations which C.S. made concerning God’s trials are so right on. God already knows how weak and miserable our faith is. His trials come not to make sure Himself that we will persevere but instead to make us ourselves aware of the dire need we have to trust more fully in Him. As the apostle Paul says in 2 Corinthians 1:9, “Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death. But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead.” How awesome!
